Navigating the Challenges of a First-Year Associate: A Personal Journey
As I sit at home, wrapped in a blanket and feeling overwhelmed, I find myself reflecting on my journey as a first-year associate in a big four tax firm. With my first year set to conclude in July, I can’t help but feel a mix of exhaustion and uncertainty.
Having started with a cohort of five new associates, it’s disheartening to realize I’m now the only one remaining in my group. The turbulence around me has been palpable, with colleagues shifting teams or facing layoffs. As I look at my schedule, the demands of my role are daunting. From now until the end of November, my calendar indicates a workload of 40+ hours each week—many weeks approaching 50 or even 70 hours. Just this week, I received news that I’ll be assigned to two additional clients, yet these tasks aren’t even reflected on my current schedule.
To add to the pressure, the CPA exam has been a relentless challenge. I’m gearing up to retake the AUD section for the fourth time this Monday. After my last FAR attempt, which I felt was my best yet, I was disheartened to learn that I had dropped 17 points from my previous score. This setback has left me questioning my capabilities and my future in this field.
The weariness I feel is overwhelming, and the months ahead seem particularly daunting. Yet, the thought of not advancing to senior associate weighs on me heavily, especially given the current job market’s instability. The question looms large: Do I even want to continue down the path of Accounting?
Every day, I wrestle with feelings of defeat and frustration, hoping to find clarity amidst the chaos. It’s a challenging time for many of us in the profession, and while I strive to stay motivated, it’s becoming increasingly difficult. If you’re in a similar position, know that you are not alone. Together, we can navigate these challenging waters and strive for a brighter future in our careers.
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